Friday, July 29, 2011

Mistakes

Obviously there is no such thing as a perfect parent.  We do our best to teach children what is right and wrong.  I taught my son starting very early that there is nothing more important than family and that there is nothing thicker than blood.  As I have mentioned before children take things very literally.  My son found himself in the middle of; let’s call it a disagreement, between his cousin and one of my sons close friends.  My son immediately defended his cousin’s position and stood against his friend…It was the wrong stand to take.  I do not want to go into the details, but my son chose the wrong side of that disagreement.  It was my fault.  What I should have taught my son is that there is one thing thicker than blood, and more important than loyalty.  That thing is personal honor.  Fortunately I recognized this quickly and was able to help my son salvage both his relationship with his friend and his cousin, but I owed all three of them an apology never the less.  I fixed my mistake by telling my son that his integrity comes from his compassion for others.  I told him that no one that loves him (friend or family) should ever ask him to betray his own honor, integrity, or sense of right and wrong.  It is important for us parents to own up to our mistakes quickly, take accountably for them, and try to fix them as fast as we recognize them.  One of the hardest things to do for any proud person is to apologize, to say I’m sorry, and to admit to being wrong.  This is something we have to teach our children only by example.

“Far better it is to have a stout heart always and suffer one's share of evils, than to be ever fearing what may happen.” --Herodotus